FOLK COLLECTION 11: The Skaggs Foundation Cowboy Poetry Collection

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When Pigs Fly

FOLK COLL 11 M-76

Les Morrow

Fletcher the 4-H'er

Each summer's trip to the county fair Makes me think of my boyhood days, Of kids and calves, and tractor pulls, In the dreamy autumn haze.

calve, livestock, move

When Pigs Fly

FOLK COLL 11 M-76

Les Morrow

Expressions

Expressions of your fellow man Affect you every day. Those little thins that pop right out That means a mouth's ajar. Those pointless, meaningless statements, Some you've heard today, But one especially drives me crazy, "Oh, say Doc, there you are."

phrase, expression, talk

When Pigs Fly

FOLK COLL 11 M-76

Les Morrow

The Wreck

He was an agent from the railroad, He'd come to settle a claim. His eyes were dark and piercing And Johnson was his name.

train, accident, wreck, claim

When Pigs Fly

FOLK COLL 11 M-76

Les Morrow

Blessings

One day I stopped to count my blessings, As a father I've got quite a few. I'd realized I'd taken most for granted. At giving thanks, well I guess I'm past due.

blessings, polite, gratitude

When Pigs Fly

FOLK COLL 11 M-76

Les Morrow

New Car Bug

I wonder have you noticed, When you get that new car bug, How the salesmen crowd around to see Who gets to pull the rug?

comparison, metaphor, dog, salesman

When Pigs Fly

FOLK COLL 11 M-76

Les Morrow

Ewe II

You might recall about a poem I've told, One I thought had no equal, About the ewe that drug to the city square? Well, now it's got a sequel.

sheep, death, freeze, truck

Croutons on a Cow Pie

FOLK COLL 11 B-77

Baxter Black

Dressin' Up

Dressin' up to certain good folks Might mean a suit and a tie Designer socks, a diamond ring Or hair like the fourth of July.

clothes, suit, fashion, cowboy

Croutons on a Cow Pie

FOLK COLL 11 B-77

Baxter Black

A Hundred Years Too Late

I psychoanalyzed myself And pondered at my fate. And realized that I was born A hundred years too late.

history, birth, lifestyle, cowboy

Croutons on a Cow Pie

FOLK COLL 11 B-77

Baxter Black

The Accident

My ol' friend Wayne had an accident Seems he'd treated himself to a nip And came home late with the bottle stashed In the pocket there on his right hip.

accident, drunk, mirror

Croutons on a Cow Pie

FOLK COLL 11 B-77

Baxter Black

The Elk Hunt

Lo, the weary hunter came No blood upon his hands. His darlin' wife, in sweet relief Bid welcome to her man.

hunters, trip, chat

Croutons on a Cow Pie

FOLK COLL 11 B-77

Baxter Black

Cowboy Heaven

I never did do it for the money I guess you done figgered that out But I's never broke, fer long anyways Gettin' rich ain't what it's about

heaven, cattle, ranch

Croutons on a Cow Pie

FOLK COLL 11 B-77

Baxter Black

Boller Gets a Word in Edgewise

Hi frendz and felo cowdogz, I, Baxter's faythfull unaprizeated 'good dog' and bezt frend, have subsutooted my collum for his. Becase he takes grate delite in piken on mans best frend, us, the all Amerakin cowdog, I cann't tell name... "go git In The Pikup, Yoo..." Ha, ha, funny as a pech pite in the Gravy Trane!

cowdog, letter, frustration

Croutons on a Cow Pie

FOLK COLL 11 B-77

Baxter Black

Karl's First Sale

Anybody that has ever put on their own livestock sale knows Murphy's Law. Lew and Benny hired on to help Karl make his first purebred offering a success. Karl (that's Karl with a K) was a good cowman who did things the old way. Hard work was all he knew. Lew claimed he was the toughest man he ever met. He was oblivious to pain. He was that rare combination of brute strength and awkwardness. He didn't understand the fine points of creative finaning or investor counseling. His neighbors even suggested that Karl was a little stupid. They were still sayin' it after their banks had foreclosed and they were doin' day work for Karl!

cattle, sale, livestock, chaos

Croutons on a Cow Pie

FOLK COLL 11 B-77

Baxter Black

The Phone Call

It's always been a mys'try In the winter when it's slow Why a rancher gets up early When he's got no place to go!

evening, phone, impatient

Croutons on a Cow Pie

FOLK COLL 11 B-77

Baxter Black

All Beef Nuggets

In the last twenty years there's been a significant trend toward larger cattle. Purebred breeders have consecrated their exotic genes 'til the modern bovine looks like a Great Dane on steroids. Our cattle have gotten bigger and bigger and bigger! It's gotten to the point where the Chianina people don't have to hire short Italians anymore to take that picture! But I'm wondering if maybe we're goin' the wrong way?

breed, miniature, cattle

Croutons on a Cow Pie

FOLK COLL 11 B-77

Baxter Black

The #2 Hairball

Ever buy one of those feeders That never seems to get well? Right off the truck to the sick pen Straight from receiving to hell!

sickness, hospital, cow

Croutons on a Cow Pie

FOLK COLL 11 B-77

Baxter Black

The Hired Man

When they put him on the payroll All the cowboys wondered "why?" 'Cause he didn't own a saddle, Couldn't rope and didn't try!

handyman, job, quit

Croutons on a Cow Pie

FOLK COLL 11 B-77

Baxter Black

Good Bye, Old Man

Somewhere deep in the old man's eyes A mem'ry took a hold. It fought the ageless undertow That drains and mocks the old.

memory, death, friend

Croutons on a Cow Pie

FOLK COLL 11 B-77

Baxter Black

The Oyster

The sign upon the cafe wall said OYSTERS: fifty cents. "How quaint," the blue eyed sweetheart said, with some bewildermence, "I didn't know they served such fare out here upon the plain?" "Oh, sure," her cowboy date replied, "We're really quite urbane."

oyster, testicles, steer

Croutons on a Cow Pie

FOLK COLL 11 B-77

Baxter Black

The Marker

The very first time I saw him, he was comin' off the truck. The order buyer had averaged down, or elese just plain got stuck! He went in a pen of feeders but when it came time to sell The packer buyer cut him off. The reason was plain as hell,

feed, cattle, sale, thin

Croutons on a Cow Pie

FOLK COLL 11 B-77

Baxter Black

Keep On Truckin'

Horses were meant to be ridden Chickens were meant to be fried Fish were meant to be cat food Pigs were meant to be styed Sheep were meant to be sweaters Eagles were meant to be bald But never, and I mean never, my friend, Were cattle meant to be hauled!

haul, truck, cattle, difficulty

Croutons on a Cow Pie

FOLK COLL 11 B-77

Baxter Black

Tinker and Lady

A stranger hangin' around cow workin's, sale barns or gatherin's might get the impression that little love exists between the cowboy and his dog. Only that the dog suffers from verbal abuse or that the cowboy is entitled to sue for mental exasperation. Neither is prone to open displays of affection. The cowboy acts tough and the dog acts bored.

dog, lost, love, chili

Croutons on a Cow Pie

FOLK COLL 11 B-77

Baxter Black

Eat More Beef!

I'm a fairly frequent victim of the EAT MORE BEEF! campaign. I've read the ads and seen the spots intended to explain That if I will eat real beef, I will be real people And have more iron inside me that a rusty army Jeep'll!

revenge, beef, bull

Croutons on a Cow Pie

FOLK COLL 11 B-77

Baxter Black

Farmer or Rancher

There is a distinction in the livestock business between ranchers and farmers. But how does a city slicker tell the difference? I have some guidelines that should be helpful.

rancher, farmer, difference

Croutons on a Cow Pie

FOLK COLL 11 B-77

Baxter Black

In Defense of the Chicken

Everyone says they love chicken, Ambrosia sent from above. But nobody loves a chicken, A chicken ain't easy to love.

chicken, crazy, food